I'm not a Pin Cushion!

So today, after fasting for 12+ hours, I went to the Health Center to get my blood drawn for the various tests I'm undergoing as mentioned previously.  After waiting for a good long while, they took me back to the torture chair where they proceeded to stick me with a needle FIVE TIMES!!  Five times (including once in my hand OuCH!) because my veins like to hide and they had a hard time finding them even after constricting my arm, making me pump my fist and using a heating device laid on my skin.  Can you say ridiculous?  The entire process took overan hour. Now, 5 hours later, my arms are black and blue and I got so many holes I look like I shoot up.  No more tests for me! Nu- uh!

And Yet These People Can Concieve? (April Edition)

Welcome to April!  I thought I'd kick this month off with a bang by whipping out another round of "And Yet THESE People Can Concieve?" 

First up, we have a reader submission! 

The most fabulous Suzanne Westover referred me to this story.  That headline reads:

"Louisiana woman charged with trading 2 small children for pet cockatoo and $175 in cash"

Awesome.  Truly legendary.  And I'd say her children got the best deal of them all.  Which bring me to my next point... the woman traded the kids to a couple who have infertility problems.  I wish I had known that there are magical people like this in the world a long time ago!  Will you accept $50 and an expired Entertainment Book? 

Next up, we've got our tried-and-true finds from the Fail Blog.

I submit that, as long as the mom doesn't fart, this doesn't look too uncomfortable.

Just a little further...a little further...

Nuff said...

And last but not least, I humbly submit to you....

FUTURE PARENTING FAIL

 

Pills and Pokey Things

So today I went to the doctor to have a cheerful chat about what they were going to do about the fact that I haven't ovulated in nine months or had a period since Dec 20th.  He recommended lots of options and we finally decided on a medication called Metformin.  Basically, this is a medication given to those suffering from diabetes but has been found effective in regulating monthly cycles and causing ovulation.  My doc also said it could result in weight loss because of the pills side effects of making you vomit and have diarrhea of five minutes so I'm really excited about that!  (to all those who can't recognize sarcasm...that was it) Unfortunately I have to wait a week or more before I can take it while I undergo lots of testing.  Most of these tests I'm going to be doing tomorrow including testing for high cholesterol, thyroid problems, pre-diabetes and like I mentioned before...PCOS.  Today they tested me to see if I was pregnant (after all I haven't had a period in almost four months), but after being poked with a needle three times by an incompetent nurse as well as painful digging around in my arm, followed by waiting for the result for an hour, the test came back as, you guessed it! Negative!...big surprise there...

Anyway, I'll post the results of all my tests as I know them.  Wish me luck!

DIEt

Easter has come and gone, yet I am unfulfilled. Because I’m on a diet.

Blah. I hate that word. DIET. I’m certain it isn’t a coincidence that it begins with the word D-I-E. While I’m not a bad or voluminous eater, I certainly have some weight to lose. It’s frustrating to me that I don’t eat much more or worse than other, more skinny folks, but yet my body is apparently operating under the pretense that we are about to go into a long winter, in Siberia, without any rations to sustain us whatsoever. I think I shared in the past that my fertility doc explained my body type as the kind that, should my oxen keel over and die in mid-field plowing, I could just pick up the yolk and finish the job myself. Great... Just awesome... A very convenient condition for the 1800s (pre-McDonalds) where a strong back and slow metabolism equaled a long life. Not so good right now.

On top of that, I’m getting tested for PCOS. Ah, PCOS… where I can diet and exercise and still weigh 5000 lbs. Yeah, that's the one. So, as I mentioned earlier, I'm on a all liquid diet.  I have lost nine pounds which is the most success I've had in the last three years and I'm hoping the trend continues.  Everyone keep your fingers crossed!

The Infertility Journey

Ever wonder about the expression, “infertility journey?” To my way of thinking, infertility is a journey because in the process, you may find yourself making decisions and having experiences that you never before imagined.

For example, I’ve talked with many friends who find themselves thinking about undergoing IVF treatment, when perhaps just a few months earlier, they would never have imagined that their fertility journey would have taken them to that place. Where before the prospect of undergoing invasive treatment and taking powerful drugs seemed daunting, now the quest for a child is changing all of that. The undo-able now becomes the “next thing” to be done.

All of this takes a toll on the mind as well as the body. As part of your infertility treatment, I believe it’s important to consider your emotional well-being, and the state of your marriage and relationships.

Don’t let your quest become so single-minded that you become blind to the whole of what you need.

If you find yourself feeling stressed, confused, overwhelmed, sitting down and talking to counselor who specializes in reproductive issues, or even just starting a blog like this one, can be of enormous help. You can learn skills and gain insights that can help you to grieve, to make decisions, and ultimately to heal. In this way, no matter what happens, you’ll know that you will come through this stronger and healthier than before.  That's my goal.

Infertility and Sex: A Reminder of the Problem

One of the most devastating things about infertility is the way it can impact you and your partner’s intimate relationship. Something that was just supposed to be between the two of you has now become a means to an end, subject to timing, testing, and in some cases, clinical intervention. Unfortunately, being intimate can now become a reminder of the problem.  For this reason, I've decided to offer  my advice(such as it is).
Here is some tips on how to stay connected to your partner, and nurture intimacy on your fertility journey:
Plan a date night: Make time to be alone and together, ideally on a weekly basis. Do things that encourage interaction, especially the types of things you enjoyed doing when you first became a couple. Talk about anything that comes to mind EXCEPT money, your jobs, and–you guessed it–fertility!
Plan for nonsexual physical connection: It’s important to start to link up having fun and being together physically. Some great ways to do this are to consider nonsexual physical activities like ballroom dancing, taking a yoga class, working out at the gym–things that make you feel physically good about yourself, and one another.
Plan getaways: There are times when you need to throw caution (and your fertility protocol) to the wind, and just get away. Sometimes a change in scenery can help recharge a relationship. Plan for these breaks–even an overnight can do wonders.